Try to imagine a party so awesome you start drinking not too long after Earth reaches Perihelion, but you don’t write about it until now, 3 months later, during the vernal equinox. Go ahead, try. You can’t. But we were there. We survived it.
The Great Brouhaha
“I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion…watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate…” Roy Batty1
“So? I was at the Hogs & Heifers/Breach-Bang-Clear Brouhaha.” Jeremy Stafford2
“What do you mean I have the tattoo of a rodeo clown on my ass?” Ryan Hey3
Tuesday, January 23rd, will now forever be immortal. Not just as the anniversary of the ascension of the Hongwu Emperor and the Ming Dynasty, though that was kind of a big deal. Not for the Battle of Rorke’s Drift nor Nixon’s peace accord with Vietnam (though both deserve a place in the history books). No, henceforth January 23rd shall forever be memorialized as the anniversary of the first annual Brouhaha.
Though ironically there are many there that night who cannot remember it…
This was a hellaciously bodacious, salaciously audacious, occasionally pugnacious, and delightfully curvaceous shindig. Given the presence of the Breach-Bang-Clear staff and badass booze-slinging —bartenderesses of Hogs & Heifers, attendance by visitors from all over the tactical/firearms industry, backed by a metric fuckton of work done by Penny Osiecki4 and Sara Liberte5, and of course the most superlative of event conduction by the inimitable Michelle Dell…
Well, let’s just say it was a triumph of kindred spirits.
Allying to raise money for the LVMPD Honor Guard, we and Hogs & Heifers were joined by CRI Counter-Terrorism Training School and Axe Monkeys, then supplied with whiskey and pizza by Crown Royal and Pizza Rock, for an evening of raucous, ribald, frequently profane and — when necessary — solemn celebration.
Here are a couple of reminiscences from our crew.
Often when you go to the big industry party’s during SHOT, you end up wondering who are these people and what do they actually do in the industry. Our Brouhaha was a bit different though. It had ladies dancing on the bar while making dick jokes through a microphone, axes getting tossed for charity and the Las Vegas PD Honor Guard at it. It was a get together of mostly friends because the average convention-goer is too cheap to leave the strip.
Valuable lessons were learned like this Canadian only knows how to hold and use an ax and can’t fathom why you would throw a perfectly good one. That Benchmade knife made a great place to laser engrave your bosses head. What happened to that folder anyway? Or that you can have a damn fun night at an everyone welcome party in a biker bar off the strip.
I certainly look forward to next year.
– Ryan Houtekamer6
In the midst of the drinks and bartop dancing, the bar fell silent and a complete respect for the honor guard entering was immediately recognized. As the honor guard filed in everyone’s hands began to rise to their hearts and once the colors were set everyone promptly and proudly stated the pledge of allegiance. In a time of much political turmoil in the country, it was amazing to see individuals from all different backgrounds stand in unison and show respect to the flag and the officers walking in. It was also an honor to be present for the presentation of this banner to the Captain if LVMPD on behalf of the numerous citizens who were affected by the Las Vegas shooting. It was personally humbling for me, as a currently serving LEO, to see that level of appreciation for the police and first responders.
– Nick Clesceri7
Oh, and read this:
God willing and the Creek don’t rise, we’ll be doing another Brouhaha next year. We’d like to triple what we generated for charity this year, and it would be great if Reeder and Montgomery made it home under their own power. That’s a lot even for Big Joe to carry.
Declare for Morning Wood!