Pontifications

Eat Tacos, Carry a Gun, and Don’t Be an Asshole

Today we present a few words of life and advice and some thoughts on the subject of gun control, delivered by our very first Brand Ambassador and Designated Gun Bunny, Jóhannes Tömas Badmoonssen. Jón-Töm has apparently started banging Fedele Noíchrothach again, but made time to answer his legions of his devoted fans. Mad Duo

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Eat Tacos and Don’t Be an Asshole

Many of you have noticed my silence on all this gun control talk in the media lately. Well, vast, thronging mobs of my die-hard fans (at least three of you) have actually asked, “Jon, why so quiet?” lately. Alas, those brave three souls are enough to open up my keyboard assault wave. So, while attempting to swerve away from the beaten-horse topics, here goes….

One of the biggest problems I see, as a gun owner/advocate, is the disconnect between the opposing sides of the argument. Both parties in the debate roll in prepared to duel til their dying breath, armed with compelling statistics and the fruition of their ninety seconds worth of research on FuckYouImRightAndYoureWrong.com. There’s always at least one or two of the proverbial adages used that sound like cheap bumper sticker quotes on both sides of the trenches.

Realistically, people like me won’t ever be persuaded to support gun control measures because people like me are not adequately represented by our legislators and/or the talking heads of mainstream media. Every single time some chickenshit dirtbag picks up a weapon and shoots up a bunch of folks, the misinformed talking heads punch the overtime clock and start shoveling their donkey shit down my throat, all the while attempting to either shame me into submission by name calling. Or they filibuster me with their own sparse knowledge of firearms, plus their insight into intended word uses and grammatical phrasing of the 1700’s.

Exhibit A
A perfect example of what I’m saying is the old video of Cali state Senator Kevin DeLeon and his “ghost gun” word-salad rant. If you’ve not seen it, google it. Basically, what it shows is a man with zero knowledge of modern firearms who feels confident enough to discuss what is, and is not, inherently dangerous to the public.

Exhibit B
A more recent example is the little animation CNN just aired attempting to explain what a bump fire stock is, when the animation rifle shown doesn’t even have a bump fire stock on it. They either don’t have any knowledgeable technical advisers on staff or they purposefully misrepresented the topic by using an incorrect image of a rifle that, coincidently, sported an accessory that has recently been gaining traction toward being removed from an antiquated ban list.

Exhibit C
This one comes more in the form of heresy, but I’m certain both sides to the debate will agree on its use: “But Jon, you mean you wouldn’t support some kind of sensible gun control measures?!”

Short answer, “FUCK NO!!”

“Ermergosh! Why not?!”, you ask. Hold onto your bikini briefs because imma explain why not.

This past year, our federal agency governing these guns had to reverse a decision that previously declared a weapon illegal based on the manner in which it was fired. Not because of its detachable magazine, or the caliber, or lethality of it, but it was illegal if you stuck it against your shoulder to fire it. Let me elaborate a little here. This stems from an AR “pistol” accessory designed to help a shooter stabilize the weapon against their forearm. The little accessory was nothing more than a molded piece of plastic or rubber that attached to a rear return spring housing. The feds deemed it legal to have on an AR pistol as long as the user didn’t hold it incorrectly. If you brought the weapon up, in line with your shoulder, and put your cheek against the rear of it, it was completely fine. But damn you to the 7th layer of hell if you allow it to contact your shoulder when shooting it.

Does that sound sensible to anybody? It sure never did to me. Why would any gun supporter be willing to sit and listen to the troglodytes that spring from their little bubbles after a shooting to spout off their stats and incorrect gun knowledge in favor of “sensible gun control,” when none of it actually leads to what they claim to support? Or there’s always the approach where gun ban supporters stand on their moral high ground, built on topics like abortion legality and government programs designed to keep the poorest people in the country impoverished, and talk about how reprehensible my group of gun owners are. Sound like a bunch of people mulching over the same old shit and not getting anywhere to you? It sure does to me. Thus, my reservation against hearing out these misinformed politicians talk of “sensible gun control”.

Quick commercial break – go buy some of our shirts and patches why don’tcha?

I would greatly welcome anyone’s ideas for weeding out these mass shooter, chickenshit cowards from the gun owning realm, as they only give people like me a bad image. However, a word of warning to any of you would-be talking heads: make sure you do your research and come prepared to support your theories and claims, for I have closely followed this topic all of my life, and bring thirty years experience with these weapons to the table.

“Eat tacos, carry a gun, and don’t be an asshole.” ~ Jóhannes Tömas Badmoonssen, Bad Moon Armory.

Note: Yes we know he isn’t pretty, no he’s not showing off his boobs, and we’re well aware he’s not a famous celebrity instructor whose training organization has a badass name. He’s all we could afford.



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5 Comments

  1. An estimated 88,000 people die every year from alcohol-related causes, the third leading preventable cause of death.

    88,000.

    When they outlaw booze, then, maybe ill entertain a discussion on gun control.

  2. One glaring fact I noticed absent from all the discourse regarding the Las Vegas shooter is how much practice (time and money for ammo) the shooter invested to become as effective/proficient in the use of the bump stock. The accounts of the media and even the NRA make it sound like it’s some sort of mythical device that instantly gives your AR-15 the rate of fire of an M249. Most of the people I know saw the Slide Fire as simply some hillbilly shit.

    As far as the Sig (and other) braces…I’ve worked some cases with the ATF Tech Guys. The original decision was throwing the community a bone. Then it went south when they literally were getting truck loads of letters every day asking either the same question they had already answered or just out of this world questions, i.e. ‘If I mill out my lower receiver, drill a hole for the auto sear pin, install a full auto fire control group, slap on a 7.5” Upper and only fire the weapon with the Sig brace shouldered as a Stock, is it still considered a Pistol?’

    I envision a manager in WV shouting ‘THAT IS IT!!! ONE MORE FUCKING LETTER ABOUT THE GODDAMN SIG BRACE AND IT GETS THE BAN HAMMER!!! YOU DID THIS TO YOURSELVES!!!’

  3. Gun controllers will never ever stop their rhetoric and efforts until they achieve their ultimate goal of a complete and total ban of every firearm that goes bang! PERIOD! And a death by a thousands cuts is just as effective as lopping off the head as UK and AU have done. So absolutely no f’ing way can anything be given up. I’d rather continue to pay $200 for a new can than have bump stocks banned. And bump stock are a POS IMO.

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